Saturday (I dont want to blog about politics) night.

The kitchen is on hold for today. I've done enough now and I need a beer. It's time for a few scoops, and later on, me and Mrs Bucko are off to watch Cherrybomb.

This is the state of play so far:

It seems we have a long way to go.

Went clay pigeon shooting earlier. My gun went "click". Only had the bugger for two months and it's broken. I had to take it back to the shop to be repaired.

When I told my mate about it, he asked me how long it's going to spend in the backyard, up on bricks.

It seems I've gained a reputation for owning crap that doesn't work.

I have another problem too.

How do you convince two established cats that this is not a threat to them?

Mrs Bucko got the little guy off someone at work. Trouble is, our cats are having a very hard time accepting him.
Maybe Longrider has some advice? (Please)

Otherwise we will have to find a good home for the tiny fella.

I said I have a reputation for owning crap that doesn't work. There's a reason for that. I once owned a 1990 Audi Quattro. The bloody thing was mint and I drove it every day.

The starter motor went, so I bunged the car in the backyard and bought a replacement. Being somewhat mechanically minded, it's surprising how often starter motors have got the better of me.

This one was located well under the car and was bloody difficult to get at from above. I got two of three bolts out but couldn't get to the last one no matter what I tried.

Eventually it took two spanners and a length of galvanised pipe to get the bugger out. At this point the car had been in the yard for at least two months. It took just as long to fit the new one, and even then the car wouldn't start.

After a total of five months laid up, I found that I had connected the terminals the wrong way round.

By the time I got the car running again, the brakes were totally seized and the back seats were covered in mould.

I got 160 quid for it on ebay. We buy any car .com offered my fifty, the bastards.

I also replaced a starter on Mrs Buckos Seat. That one was on the top of the engine and looked really easy. Ellisons auto electrics, where I bought the new one is 5 minutes away from my work so I bought it in my dinner hour and decided to replace it at the same time.

Again I got two bolts out and the third one stumped me. I had no time left so I put the two bolts back and decided to try again at home. Outside our house I got the last bolt out by lying under the car and using an extendable tyre iron.

It turned out that the last bolt also held in one of the engine mounts. When I got it out, the engine dropped by a good six inches and almost squashed my head. I saw my life in fast forward.

I had to jack up the engine with a bottle jack and a cinder block the get the bolt back in the replacement.

I'm just glad that didn't happen on the works car park or I would have been stuffed.

The real pisser was when the starter went on Mrs Buckos old Nissan Sunny. It started playing up so I bought a replacement from the same place near work. On the way home we stopped at Tesco and couldn't get the bugger started again.

We had to call out the AA. The chap turned up and said we could push start it down the car park. I happened to mention that I had a new starter motor in the boot that I planned to fit when we got home.

You know what he said? "Do you want me to bung it on for you?"

Seriously. "Bung it on".

I thought I was calling his bluff by saying yes, but the bastard had it fitted in fifteen minutes and we were on our way.

Did I say I was mechanically minded? I am, really. Really?

Have a good weekend.