Pages

This post is brought to you live from Croatia!

Well the weather picked up (see previous post). The past couple of days have been scorching and today is no different. We're going home tomorrow, so Mrs Bucko has decided to hermit today, but I've just spent the past couple of hours sat outside a bar in the baking sun, having a couple of pints

There's not a lot to do round here, so the theme has been 'chill until we can't chill no more', which as short holidays go, is not a bad thing

Some people asked me about the smoking rules in Croatia before we left, so here it is

They do have a smoking ban and it's not ignored like it is in Greece, they do take it seriously. Fortunately it is nowhere near as bad as in England (I'm not endorsing it, my position has always been that it's not the Governments' place to decide where people can smoke and the property owner should always be the one to choose)

Smoking is not allowed in restaurants or other places where food is served, unless it is outside. Smoking is allowed in bars and they all choose to be smoker friendly

'Outside' has a different meaning here to back home. If you're within the solid brick structure of the building, that's inside. If you're in the wood frame and glass covered extention, that's outside. There's also outside as we know it, the uncovered patio area

Because the ban is only in food places, there is a very noticeable segregation between food and smoking. We went in a cafe bar yesterday that served food and they would not allow us to eat outside. Because we weren't hungry anyway, we just got a couple of drinks and sat in the sun. When we were looking for somewhere to eat a light snack a couple of days previous, we went in a number of smaller cafe bars in the centre and none of them served food, presumably because they didn't have the space to segregate food and smoking

So the ban does still stifle your choices if you are eating

The bars are great though. When you're having a few pints, you don't want to be going outside for a smoke, like you do in England and none of the bars we have been in, made you do that. If it's a wet venue only, smoking is allowed throughout and so far, we have seen no exceptions

The old rule seems to apply, if you are allowed to have smoking in your venue, it remains the financially sound position to take

They also have a tobacco display ban, which just seems to apply to the 'super'makets and not the small kiosks. Again, unlike England, it's not quite as strict. If you ask if they have a brand of cigarettes and the language barrier kicks in, they open the doors and let you take a look for yourself

They also don't mind about you taking your time to get it right. Mrs Bucko smokes menthol, so that and the cheapest brand were what we've been looking for to take home. Nobody seems to sell cigarettes by the sleeve for some reason, so we've been in a few supermarkets and just bought every pack they had of Green Lucky Strike. We seriously held up a couple of queues by doing so too, and whereas we got some groans from the people behind us waiting to pay for their weird European loaves of bread, the staff really could not give a tiny rats arse and will treat you as their only customer until you have found and paid for exactly what you want

I've also found that nobody sells small cigars. I brought a hundred with me and they ran out this morning. I have enough big ones left to see me through and my aeroplane e-gig if necessary, but the only country I've been to so far who do not sell small cigars was America. I thought they were quite popular on the continent

Anyway, so that's the state of play with smoking. Not bad as it goes, but still doesn't beat Greece

I would only recommend Zadar for a holiday if you're here to relax, which fortunately we were. There is very little to do here and if we had come for two weeks, we would not have found enough to amuse us for that long

We are staying in a tiny village with about four restaurants and two pubs, which is a fifteen minute bus ride from the main town. There a couple more, but they are not open yet and probably waiting for the season to kick in first. It's early doors yet

Even in the town though, we found very few eating places and no signs of any nightlife. There are a lot of small cafe bars if you want a pub crawl and are willing to put in some legwork, but honestly, it's probably better picking one good place and putting down roots if you want to drink in the town

Each pub we've been in so far closes at 11:00pm, but it may be that that also changes when the season gets going

Food places in the town seems to be none existent and shopping was incredibly poor. There is a big shopping centre in the town called the Galleria, but most of it was deserted; empty shops and no people

For an extra ten minute bus ride you can go to a much bigger shopping centre called Supernova, but large as it was, it was mainly fashion outlets and little else

There's also the Old Town, but we didn't bother, so I couldn't tell you what it's like

The place is definitely beautiful and now the rain has stopped, also very warm, however unless you intend to do nothing other than relax, there isn't much to see here

And so ends this latest edition of Travels With the Mooses. It's a relaxing day tomorrow, followed by an evening with Ryanair, then home. Normality begins shortly after

See ya!

Bloody weather!

It's holiday time again for the Moose family, so today's blog is brought to you from the town of Zadar in Croatia
It was never supposed to be a sunny beach holiday, but the weather is taking the piss a bit. It's been coming down in buckets since half five this morning. I knew I was not going to get a tan this week, but I didn't expect to go rusty

We arrived about 22:00 local time last night and took a walk to find a place where we could have a beer and fortunately, now we're in a more civilised country, a smoke too

Unpacking waited until this morning. When you've spent the better part of a day with Ryanair, your first priority is a pint and a fag. I keep saying I'll never fly with Ryanair again, but they keep coming up as the cheaper option. I've been prepared to pay an extra thirty of forty quid to fly with Easyjet in the past, but this time, the flights were cheaper by ninety quid each, so I bit the bullet and went with Ryanair. After we got here, we decided that no matter the cost, we're not doing Ryanair again ever. Let's see if we stick to that

We made it to the car park at terminal 3 without taking a single wrong turn, which is a personal best for us. We also turned up early enough to get our bags on the plane first, so they were off first too, which was a bonus

There's no smoking area at terminal 3 after security, but we explored a little more this time and found a small cafe that sold bottled beer, in the shopping area before security, so we managed to have a few scoops where we could just nip outside for a fag. We left it as long as possible before going through security, but still managed a couple of pints airside

A bought a small e-cig for that bit. There were 'no e-cigs' signs everywhere, but we used it anyway. I think they ban e-cigs in some public places because of people like my brother in law, who carries a portable smoke machine and blows annoying, fruit flavoured clouds everywhere he goes

A young(ish) couple got on the plane next to me, so Introduced myself, told the chap I was terrified of flying and apologised in advance for anything socially unacceptable that I might do on take off and landing. The last time I flew, I pulled the hair of the girl in front of me when the plane lifted off. Fortunately she took it with good grace...

So it's day one, I've had a hot dog for breakfast, got soaked to the bone on the way back and am about to have a nap, before going out in search of a bar. A first glance, there appears to be very little to do around here, but we won't know for sure until this horrendous rain stops and we can get out and explore

See ya


Monkey Magic

Everything is 'Racist' these days
Danny Baker fired from BBC Radio 5 Live after ‘racist’ Royal Baby tweet
I'd forgotten who Danny Baker was and I can't remember a time when I've ever listened to Radio 5. I think they're both something to do with football, but today, they're both something to do with faux outrage
The 61-year-old broadcaster last night shared a picture of a couple leaving a hospital, holding hands with a chimpanzee, with the caption: ‘Royal baby leaves hospital.’
It's actually quite funny in it's own way:


But for some reason, the Twitter mob decided it was racist and in usual form, demanded Mr Baker be fired from his job. The BBC in usual form, capitulated to the mob and binned him
Controller Jonathan Wall told all 5 Live staff in an email: ‘Danny made a serious error of judgement on social media last night and it goes against the values we live and breathe on this radio station.’
Although Danny has seen fit to 'appologise' for the tweet, at least he's standing up for himself
‘The call to fire me from @bbc5live was a masterclass of pompous faux-gravity. Took a tone that said I actually meant that ridiculous tweet and the BBC must uphold blah blah blah. Literally threw me under the bus. Could hear the suits knees knocking. #F***em.’
How on Earth do people see a parody tweet of a posh chimp as something racist? We live in the most tolerant country and the most tolerant time in history. Racism really is a thing of the past in these parts, yet people continue to stir it up on a daily basis. It's as though some people just can't bear to live in a world without racism, so they have to invent their own. Why, is beyond me

Take this article, for example:
Ex-Blackburn with Darwen councillor suspended by Tories over 'racist' post
As soon as I read the title, I knew that the 'racist' post would be nothing of the sort. I was not wrong
Konrad Tapp, who stood for Darwen West in last week’s local elections, shared a clearly-marked English Defence League message attacking the Islamic veil on Facebook.
It said: ‘Respect for Britain: No niqab/burka’ and a picture allegedly of a Muslim on a beach with a poster saying: ‘Respect Ramadan - no bikinis’.
The underlying theme in the comments, my own included, is that being critical of Islam is not racist, because Islam is not a race. The paper points out that the shared image was 'clearly marked' as being from the English Defence League. The assumption being that anything they say or do is racist by definition

Take a look


Whatever your view of the EDL, this image is clearly not racist. It's a response to a Muslim being critical of western dress (which I assume is not deemed racist). The response in kind is critical of Muslim dress and by extension, a critique of Islam. And again, Islam is not a race

So the councillor gets fired for sharing (note, not creating) this image and another councillor steps up and adds this:
Cllr Taylor said: "This is really inexcusable.The post was racism of the worst kind.
Racism of the worst kind? Can we think of any worse examples of racism than this, ladies and gentlemen? Of course we can. If we think back, we can remember a time when people were lynched by mobs and hanged from trees because of racism. Apparently that has nothing on this image though. Pointing out that wearing a burka is not conductive to western society, particularly if you've already objected to westerners wearing bikinis, is a worse form of racism that hanging the burka wearer from a tree

Remember South Africa, when blacks and whites were not allowed to share the same beaches? That a worse form of racism, is it not? yet the picture with the bikinis caption is asking for a watered down but similar form of segregation

That's not racist though, apparently

Councillor Taylor and people like him, including those who called for Danny baker to be fired over #BabyChimpGate, are the problem here. They are the reason why people just can't get along, not us

I've met Councillor Taylor. He's a nanny statist to the core, so I'm not surprised he's ready to step up to the plate and shout racist. These people are all alike

See if you can spot my comment under the Telegraph article. My 'BuckoTheMoose' username was banned after I commented, "Import the Third World, get the Third World", under and article about Asian thugs having a kick off in college. Probably because it was 'racist'

Don't Fear the Snipper?

I was talking with some friends on Frank Davis' Smokey Drinkey Bar on Saturday night. One of the 'after many beers' conversations was about the time when I had the snip

Then yesterday I spotted this tripe in the Guardian (where else):
Vasectomies are suddenly unpopular, but in a heterosexual couple it’s a feminist action for a man to take
A feminist action?
My husband doesn’t want a vasectomy. [...] But the thing is, he and I have finished having babies and I feel like my turn should be over. A vasectomy would feel like a feminist action on his part, an acknowledgment of everything I have been through that has got us to this point in our lives.
Everything you've been through? Pain for pain? An eye for an eye? A penis for a... never mind, just kidding

Mrs Bucko and I do not have kids and have never wanted them. When I had the snip, I certainly wasn't thinking about any feminist issues, it just seemed like a good idea at the time. Mrs B was taking regular contraception and would have had to continue to do so for many years. Having the snip was a permanent solution and I like permanent solutions. The fact that she benefited the most from that choice was the main reason I made the choice, but feminism had nothing to do with it, it was just convenient
My husband doesn’t want a vasectomy. I don’t blame him: it might be a 15-minute procedure carried out under local anaesthetic, but it’s not exactly a spa treatment.
And there it is
My wife doesn't want a baby. It might be a couple hours of minor work to bring about the miracle of life, but it's no spa treatment
I'm sorry, but any woman who describes the snip in those terms, deserves to be told that shoving a seven pound pot roast through your vagina is just a walk in the park. Yeah I know, giving birth is far more painful than having the snip, but still, it's far from an easy prospect

If any man reading this is planning to have the snip done under a local anaesthetic, don't. Just don't!


If you've not had the snip yet, I'll be honest with you. It hurts. Sure, I've heard some blokes say it was nothing, that they were back at work again the day after, but to be honest, I reckon they just don't want to admit how much pain they were in while walking around like they had just got off a horse

When I decided to go for it, my doctor recommended some chap in a local surgery who does the op under a local. He said I would be in and out in an afternoon, so I decided to go for it
And as it turned out, I was in and out in an afternoon, but still unfortunately, with my bollocks intact. Have you ever had a needle in your bollocks? The first anaesthetic injection didn't work, so he had to give me a second, then a third. Apparently adrenaline counteracts the painkiller and I'll tell you this. Watching someone about to stick a needle in a testicle that is attached to you, is enough to give you a right good jolt of adrenaline. Feeling it will give you another

Every time he stuck me with the damn thing, my body fought back with it's own drugs. In the end, after my bollocks had enough holes in them, they were leaking on the trolley, the chap decided that having the snip done under a local was not for me

All that pain for nought

So I got myself booked in to have it done under a general. When the surgeon spoke to me on the day, he told me in no uncertain terms that the snip is not something that should be done under a local. I wish I'd found that out sooner

The general involved a full day in the hospital. I couldn't eat or drink anything for hours and had to wait all morning and a good portion of the afternoon sat in a waiting room wearing nothing but my dressing gown, which I only noticed on the day, was covered from head to toe in cat hairs. I must have looked a right sight
I was quite shocked when I woke up after the op though; it felt like I had been asleep for days. I can't remember ever feeling so rested. And the tuna sandwich they gave me was the best I've ever tasted. I wouldn't mind getting hold of some of the drugs they gave me, if that's what it does to you

Anyhoo, by the evening, the drugs had wore off and the pain began. They gave me a weeks sicknote and I used it all. I was still doing the 'just off a horse' walk for a couple of days after I went back to work. One side took a lot longer to heal than the other one. I think that walking to the Co-Op to buy a bottle of Jim Beam when I got home from the hospital, tore one or two of the stitches

My wife was fortunately off work that week, so while I healed, we spent most of the week sat on the couch drinking Jim Beam and watching Sons of Anarchy together

It might have been quite bloody stingy, but all in all, that wasn't a bad week

These days, when people ask me if I have, or am having kids and I tell then no, just to let them know how serious I am, I say I've had the snip. Twice

Lads, one more time, if you're getting it done, take the general anaesthetic and tuna sandwich option. Don't even consider a local

One rule for us...

According to our local rag (article from a while ago), Islamophobia, a made up word used to label anyone who questions the religion of peace as racist, has now been defined in law

There are nine definitions of Islamophobia apparently and strangely enough, denying Islamophobia exists, is not one of them, although some are open to interpretation
"Islamophobia is rooted in racism and is a type of racism that targets expressions of Muslimness or perceived Muslimness."
There's another made up word that does not exist - 'Muslimness'

The list is comprehensive bollocks, apart from the first which says you shouldn't call for Muslims to be killed, which is fair enough, but the rest are a mismash of word salad twaddle, denying the obvious and granting Muslims a protected status that the rest of us do not enjoy

This in particular, grips my shit:
• Accusing Muslims as a group of being responsible for real or imagined wrongdoing committed by a single Muslim person or group of Muslim individuals, or even for acts committed by non-Muslims.
• Holding Muslims collectively responsible for the actions of any Muslim majority state, whether secular or constitutionally Islamic.
Meaning every Muslim is not responsible for the actions of one Muslim (or a few)

After the recent Mosque shootings in New Zealand, their idiot Prime Minister decided it would be a good idea to ban everyone from owning semi-automatic rifles and to confiscate them from all the people who did not do the shootings and have never caused any harm
In the UK, after the school shooting in Dunblane, all handguns were banned and a five year minimum prison tariff introduced for possession. There is a meme doing the rounds on Facebook and such, which says that gun control works because there has never been another school shooting in England since Dunblane. What the morons who propagate this stuff do not understand (or refuse to acknowledge) is that there were no school shootings in the UK before Dunblane

Muslims as a group must not be blamed for the actions of one bad egg. UK sportsmen and women however, are collectively responsible and must be collectively punished for the actions of any nutter who uses a gun, legally held or not
[...] the myth of Muslim identity having a unique propensity for terrorism [...]
Right now, the Muslim identity has a unique propensity for terrorism. Sure, things may have been different in the past and may be so again in the future, but we live in an era where Muslim terrorism is the biggest terrorist problem the world currently faces. It's not a few bad eggs either. The Islamic faith is based on the violent put down of the unbelievers. Any Muslim who responds to acts of  Muslim terrorism and says this is not my faith, is wrong. It is the Muslim faith and they by denying such, are not true Muslims

And having said that, I may have just committed a crime. Funny isn't it? I've legally owned guns for many years and never committed a crime with one them, nor will I ever do so, yet because those that govern over us are obsessed with protecting the Muslim status, we can become criminals simply by calling bullshit

It's a funny old world

Greta Green

I don't know about you, but I'm so tired of hearing about the new, pint sized climate change activist from Sweden, young Miss Greta Thunberg. She's creating a little bit of a sensation among the green activists and the media, but she's just a child, a mouthpiece. She's being fed words and ideas by her parents and repeating them on cue. And as usually happens with brainwashed children, she likely believes everything she is being told and is probably terrified that the end of the world is nigh. Poor kid doesn't stand a chance

If Shameena Begone was groomed and too young to understand what she was doing, surely Greta 'Wednesday Adams' Thunberg is too? I'm sorry, I know name calling should be beneath me, but it's hard to remain objective with these green lunatics

And it's perfect for the loonies, a new messiah, the untouchable child. Disagree with her and you're bullying a vulnerable sixteen year old girl. Her word must be law, even if in truth, she ain't saying it

And they're lapping it up, the media, the activists and the Government alike. they're round her like flies on shit, all ears waiting for the next piece of wisdom to spring forth

Greta Thunberg is right – only a general strike will force action on climate change

They want economic chaos in order to bring about action on climate change. And what will action on climate change bring about? Economic chaos. But of course we're not dealing with rational people here, we're dealing with closet (but often open) Communists. They hate Capitalism in all it's forms and the end game of climate change activism, is it's complete destruction. They're demanding exactly what the Government wants them to demand: Higher taxes and more Government control. The end of democracy

Climate Change is the biggest scam in human history apart from religion. We are not affecting the climate. We cannot change the climate by becoming poorer. The climate is not a problem

That's not to say that we don't have other environmental issues across a wide spectrum. The activists are of course aware of this, they're definitely not single issue. Burning fossil fuels, air pollution from coal, oil, diesel, plastics in the ocean, mountains of landfill, they'll have a pop at them all. The trouble is, their only solutions to these problems are the same; destroy capitalism, make everyone poorer

Some of these issues are things we need to keep our eyes on so they don't get out of control, but you know what, they don't really matter either

What many people tend to forget is that the human race is still very much in it's infancy. In the grand scheme of things, we can't lift our own heads and are still shitting in nappies. We have a long, long way to go before we can deal with our issues. I'm not just talking a couple of generations, I'm talking evolution

Not many years have past since we first figured out how to extract dinosaurs from the earth and use them to power machines. Even less years have past since we discovered how to make abundant energy from splitting atoms. These are both very primitive technologies, worthy of a primitive species. We are aware of much more advanced technologies, such as nuclear fusion, we just don't know how to create them yet. As we grow, we will find out. We will move from dirty and dangerous nuclear fission and eventually move on to clean and abundant fusion. After that, who knows

The problem with the green lobby is that they want to solve all our problems now. The only way to do that would be to go back in time, not forward, which would cause many more problems of it's own
The green lobby see a fuel like nuclear fission, that creates radioactive waste and they say we shouldn't use it because it damages the environment. I say bugger that. If we are going to grow, we need to use the technologies available to use, learn more about them, adopt them, improve on them, make them better, cleaner, safer and more efficient, not abandon them

Yes, for a while we will create some minor problems. Plastic in the sea, nuclear waste, air pollution, depletion of resources. But we will get over it, we'll move beyond these minor issues if we embrace what we know and learn from it to grow as a people

The green lobby say we have no right to leave environmental problems to the next generation. I say we owe it to generations in hundreds or thousands of years to find the technologies that the human race needs to survive in the long term and not to let ourselves stagnate and become afraid of what we can do, just because of a few misguided but very vocal campaigners

Our generation, our kids and their kids may have to put up with a bit of a smelly planet, but in the long run, we need to embrace our current issues and keep improving if the human race is to have a long term future

*Update*
I wrote this post on Friday and scheduled it for after the weekend. When I got home from work on Friday I found out that our Government, in it's infinite wisdom, has declared a climate emergency
This is a direct result of doing what they are told by this one annoying Swedish girl. Our parliament is now run by literal children
As you can see above, I've never been concerned about climate change as it's obviously a scam. I've also never been overly concerned about many of the environmental issues about us, as I have faith in our ability to deal with them
This declaration of a climate emergency scares the hell out of me though, I don't mind saying
It could mean anything. Worst case scenario (which knowing how our leaders operate, it will probably come to), would mean the suspension of democracy that I spoke about above. With a declared emergency and emergency powers to deal with it, the Government can do anything they want and there's nothing we can do about it, as they have all the guns
Do you know what the Civil Contingencies Act is and what it can do? If not, I suggest Googling it. You may just end up as scared as I am right now