Virgin on the bonkers

Every now and then, as I once pointed out here, the name of the reporter, perfectly fits the news article. Like this one in the Lancashire Telegraph:

It was Mr Bellard that prompted my earlier post, when he wrote about a man getting caught knocking one out in a local boozer

I know some people get off on doing it in tiny lavvys at high speeds, but most people are a lot more discreet and intelligent than this couple

A COUPLE caught having sex in the toilets of an inter-city train as it left Warrington were at it again as they arrived at Euston.
Blackburn magistrates heard on both occasions the couple asked for time to get dressed.

You don't strip down to the buff for a quickie in a train stall. It's usually, zip-lob, kickers to the side, ooh mamma!

And Christopher Leigh told the train manager there were no signs to say they couldn't make love in the loo.

No signs. They need a sign to tell them that fornicating in the in the shitter, on a train, is frowned upon? Jeez! Why do some idiots think anything goes, unless there is a specific sign on the wall, warning you otherwise?
And seriously? Making love? What are you, a girl?

It was quite a funny story until I read this:

He was jailed for six weeks.

You don't get jail for a violent assault that leaves your victim with life changing injuries*, so why do you get six weeks for bonking in a train lavvy?

Ian Huggan, defending, said the female involved in the incident had been arrested, admitted the offence and dealt with by way of an out of court disposal

Seems you don't, if you're a woman


*I was going to provide a link to the man who was spared jail after inflicting life changing injuries on his victim. I typed, "Spared Jail" into the Telegraph search box, but the shear number of results meant I wasn't going to bother trawling through it all to find the right one. Suffice to say, people get away with a whole boatload of serious stuff without seeing the inside of a prison